Understanding Our Empathic Gift

An EMPATH is a soul who empathizes with the pain of the planet
and is deeply driven to save, help and heal it. We came here specifically with a mission at hand,
to raise the vibration of this planet and in turn raise the consciousness of the collective.
We are here on behalf of Mother Gaia herself, to grow, to heal and to love her beloved planet.
We are Multidimensional Galactic Divine Spiritual Beings, sent here to have a human experience.
We are here to understand and to guide the others home.

Photo Credit: “Traces” by @archannairScreenshot_20191226-124045
We live in an extremely fast paced, heavily populated world…
So naturally Empaths face many energetic challenges.

As Empath’s we are on a mission, to raise the vibration of this planet and in order to do so, our light has to be fully on. 

If we are not careful and intentional, not only are we susceptible to others dumping their negative vibes on us,
just spending time in public could drain our vital energy.

So learning to set energetic boundaries is an absolute gamechanger.

What’s really dope, is that Empaths are actually hardwired to start protecting their energy, automatically…
ecause we’re gangster like that.

However there are situations where life can seem a bit too much, we almost feel like we are being eaten up by it. But that does NOT have to last any longer than you allow it to.

I used to often feel like I was victim to this planet, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth. I’m going to share with you my bag of tricks and tactics to dominating this realm like a mutherfuken’ GANGSTER.

Intentional things you can do to protect yourself, that allow you to maintain a frequency of “magic” on a daily basis.

You would think that wanting to block out all external emotions and energies would be the goal, but it is not always that cut and dry, nor do I personally think that’s the most effective approach.

At first I was so confused as to why Empaths feel and take on what they do, emotionally…

BUT everything serves a purpose. So I did what all philosophers do, I worked backwards. 

It’s pretty obvious, that taking on these negative energies, are not helping rid the world of them. In fact, our purpose is more about receiving messages, understanding dynamics and analyzing patterns. Balancing this very non-emotional purpose with a vibrational sensitivity, allows us to truly experience this realm.

Our gift of taking on energies serves for the mere purpose of next level understanding and deepening our ability to empathize. Don’t allow yourself to get caught in that state of victimhood, your a badass, just keep observing, learning, understanding and moving forward.

The fact is, we need to know how to protect ourselves from wayward energies, how to stay focused, grounded and how to maintain our magic. 

Let’s Start Mastering This Realm:


Photo Credit: @oliver_vernonimage
If your ridin’ solo in people-congested places, you may soak up the highly charged energies no sooner than having stepped over the building’s foundation, it’s like it just hits you right in the face. So prepare yourself.

If you are someone who finds being in public areas, unbearable, to the point of avoiding them at all costs, there are some things you can do:

1.Take a Friend:

Being with another person actually acts as a energetic buffer and helps diffuse external energies. This lessens the impact, when spending time in public places. It also serves as a pleasant distraction and takes your mind off what you are feeling. Remember your incharge of your experience.

(Trust me, learning how to be in public is imperative! There’s no way my life would be as magical as it is, without being able to protect my energies, so that I can fully enjoy the magic of going to shows, crowded venues and conventions! (Seriously, if I can master this and be able to speak to large numbers of people, you can absolutely do this!)

Chances are, after, going out and about you may still feel drained but the point is that your experience will have been a much more fun, because that’s really what it’s all about!!

Eventually you will learn to shield energies out, except those you consciously choose and then the experience of your outings will begin to energize you. 

The goal is to live a lifestyle that fills you with life, not drains it.

If taking a friend, or family member, is not an option, use a grounding technique that works for you and use it before going out.

Here are some grounding options:

Power Pose + Butterfly Stretch:
A power pose is generally anything that opens up the body.

This can be as simple as opening up your arms wide (so your body is in the shape of a cross) and taking long, slow breaths through the nose. Then get your (butterfly) wings moving, swing your arms in a circular motion [this always makes me feel like Michael Phelps getting ready for a big race. lol.]

You can hold a smile is further empowerment.

Integrating movement, strength and power right before your experience will serve in uplifting and expanding your energy field. Which is opposite to how a raw Empath would typically go out into the world, wanting to feel small and invisible, as the observer.

but we are Empathic Gangsters and that’s not how we roll!

Grounding visualization:
These could be anything from visualizing roots coming from your feet, grounding you into the earth, to mentally building a halo of white light around your body and expanding it with your breath. Hell I just take my shoes off and walk around barefoot for 5 minutes and straight up connect with mother earth herself.

They sound stupid but they work, but you have to do them consciously and believe in their power. Your goal is to positively prepare yourself with self talk, it is uplifting, empowering and protective. 

Statements such as: ‘I am empowered’, ‘I am in control’, ‘I am a badass’ instantly, and positively, changes your mind-set and your vibration, which will make you better equipped to handle excessive energies.

Find one that works for you, I personally am motivated and respond best to blunt commands: “Your a gangster, go crush that shit!!”

Music therapy:
**GAME CHANGER ALERT** Music you love creates an inner-expansion. It uplifts your energy and creates a protective ‘bliss bubble’ around you. G
et into the ‘music zone’ before entering a busy place. 

I like it my music grimmy AF and full of heavy drops… what can I say, I’ve got robot ears!

There are many grounding and mind quieting methods available, such as meditation.
At the end of the day your perspective and your attitude plays a massive role. Try to remember that you are experiencing something together as a whole, with “the crowd”.

2. Focus:
more on the magic and fun your experiencing rather than the overwhelm of the people.
If you have to keep your focus close, enjoy the closest five people around you and forget the rest, just have a good time!

So, remember when I said, that naturally you will want to block out all external emotions and energies, but that I personally think that’s not the most effective approach.

That’s because I feel that the most effective approach is actually to…

3. Raise your Vibration:
In turn raising the actual power of your energy. “Don’t let the energy of the room bring you down, raise your vibration and change the energy of the room”

Techniques of grounding are amazing but they are also somewhat temporary, if you really want to change your relationship with the world, your ‘light’ vibration needs to higher, faster, stronger than those around you…

And THIS actually leads us straight into our next area of life…


Know your food and how it affects you. Listen to what your body is telling you about what is and isn’t right for you. The more in tune you become, you can actually feel the energetic vibrations of the food, intuitively knowing what is best and what you should never consume, just instinctively… that’s gangster!

Photo Credit: @randalrobertsart & @morganmandala Screenshot_20191226-131726
What we put into our bodies affects our vibration, hands down.

It doesn’t matter how many hours you sit in meditation or doing yoga or how many spiritual books you read, if you’re putting poison into your physical body, no amount of meditation or spiritual awareness is going to balance you.

Because we are highly reactive, Empaths react more to drug-like foods than those not of a sensitive nature. Empaths can taste the bitterness in lemons more than others, go red in the face easier and are affected by certain foods, drugs and alcohol reactions are worse than those who are not highly reactive.

Everything is energy vibrating at different frequencies and that includes what we eat and drink.

The faster the vibration, the higher the frequency. Empaths are negatively affected by anything of a low vibration. Certain foods, drugs and alcohol all have a low vibrational energy and they bring the Empath down fast. 

If you think or even know that your diet is impacting your health and your Empathic Gangster-ness and you are down to learn how to clean it up, let me know in the comments.

Did you know? We also pick up on the emotions of the person who was cooking our food, put into it?! 

It’s wise to know how your food is prepared. Food made in an angry or unhappy environment will carry that energy and then show up in you.

Honestly it’s best to have mainly homemade food, so you know exactly what energy goes into your food. Also, if you have never looked up what foods are best for your blood type I would at least take a peek at the list, it can be very insightful.


First and foremost understand the purpose and importance of sleep and recharging. Your body is constantly healing and detoxing itself and the sleep cycle is intended to support this process. Allot of Empaths prefer to stay awake into the early morning due to the lack of active collective energy in the air. However our bodies really want to wake up with the sun and fall with the sun. So intentionally regulating your schedule to be up in the early morning, not only benefits your bodies natural desires, but you will still be able to enjoy that calm collective energy of the early morning.

Switching gears, if you are someone who doesn’t like sleep-snuggling or having to sleep close to your partner in bed, no matter how much you love them, you are not alone.

Having sleeping-space is essential for an Empath. 

Most Empaths loathe having anyone get in their ‘energy-space’, day or night, but sleep-time is crucial for recharging, so its even more important they are allowed it.

If you share a bed, get the the largest size bed available, if space permits.

This was a game changer for both my husband and I.

If you still struggle sleeping near your partner or wake-up feeling drained, use one of the grounding techniques above and apply them to your bedtime routine.

Don’t forget to communicate to your partner, as to what is happening so they don’t take offense.


The truth is Empaths have the highest percentage of suicide and addiction.

Listen, I’ve done my fair share of partying. I know most of us have,

It’s our attempt at coping with this world and the vibrations of the planet that we are experiencing… that is until we wake up.

When I woke up, I wanted to be nothing but sober, I cut out alcohol completely.

Im became obsessed with raising my vibrations, experiencing the magic of sensitivity and sensuality and became beyond excited and intrigued by the paranormal experiences I was encountered.

None of this was be possible until I stopped numbing my issues. Substances weaken the Empath (as they do any other human). Being under the influence, may feel like external energies are blocked but unfortunately this is not the case. They still seep in and still need to be dealt with.

If you don’t like the idea of giving up your cocktail or social life, use the grounding techniques from above, before going out. I know for myself in the beginning it was almost like a unknowing of what to do with my hands if I didn’t have a drink in it, so order a mocktail, or even better water! Remember if you’re hesitating, its because you don’t think you deserve to happy and healthy and we need to change that.

Water cleanses and grounds. (alkaline water is preferred). Include alkalizing foods in your diet. Keeping your body in an alkaline state is always the goal, it helps keep you balanced and prevents alcohol doing as much damage.

If your sick and tired of always being drained and feeling like a victim to this planet and are ready to see some real fucking magic happen in your life, I recommend going alcohol free.



The longer the Empath has known a friend, the more impact the friend can have on their energy. As you would imagine this could be a good or bad thing, depending on the health of the relationship.

Listen to your instincts and consciously observe your what your body is telling you about there presents. Typically just hearing their name will tell you whether or not this is a friendship to keep or let go.

If down or depressed, a friend can unintentionally take their Empath friend down with them. In this case you have to learn to emotionally unplug. You can still listen and be there, but in a detached way. Start focusing your time and energy into more soul filling activities, your friend needs their space at this time, just as much as you do. Lead by example.

We all know people who drain energy, otherwise known as the ‘Energy Vampires’, but when a friend, who isn’t normally a drainer, is experiencing a tough time their energy-sucking tentacles may seek out an instant uplift from anywhere they can get it.

To avoid being a friend’s ‘energy-replacement-meal’, watch for energy leaks and pay attention to where its coming from. Typically it will be from one of four of the main energy centers (chakras): sacral (below belly), solar plexus (mid belly), heart (heart area) or throat (front of throat) and it may be felt by a pull or ache in that specific area.

Wherever you feel the drain, cover that area immediately with your hands or arms. It is not by chance that we cross our arms over our stomach or chest in social situations; we are subconsciously stopping an energy-drain.

If you haven’t caught on by now, you are no longer able to live your life on autopilot mode, you are now a fighter pilot, you are conscious, aware and your attention to detail is now your job. 

Empaths tend to be very faithful to their friends and keep them in their life for the long-haul. For this reason, you must choose your friends wisely. Remember, you are the sum of your five closest friends. Make sure they are the best version of yourself that you desire to be.

I am so intentional about everything I feed my body, especially when it comes to the mindset and energies of friends and those I surround myself with. As I’ve grown, I’ve had to release those who no longer aligned with the version of myself I was trying to become. I also stopped caring about length of time I’ve known them verses the quality of love and support they bring to the table. I no longer hesitate to disassociate when someone’s actions don’t align with my values. If I can’t trust you, you will not be apart of my life.


Photo Credit: @amandasageartScreenshot_20191226-131610


For an Empath finding their calling can be a challenge of epic proportions. 80% of the workforce hates their job, which doesn’t make for high vibe or happy working environments, as you can imagine. Not only that, today’s current work environments are the epitome of an energy suck! Leaving you feeling completely obliterated verses nourished and overflowing with god’s light.

For ten years straight I did nothing but work and sleep because it was all I could do to protect my soul. Work, Recover, Repeat.

I remember my “aha” moment…

I was not sure what its was exactly that I was going to do. All that I did know was that every place I had ever worked, I was always smarter than the boss, I worked harder and produced greater sales than anyone else. I became sick and tired of working hard for someone else’s dream. I remember thinking, “damn, if I work this hard for someone else, I’m going to be unstoppable in my own business!!” and then clarity struck, “Torie your purpose is to make this world a better place and whatever you do and wherever you are, all you have to do is just be yourself.”

“Damn straight!!” I remember in that moment I wrote down, on small piece of paper,
my first business plan:

“Show up. Be Yourself. That’s Enough.”

and that was it.

It was THIS action, that unlocked the gate that put me on this path, of creating EMPATHIC GANGSTER®. 

All “this” truly was, was a perspective change… I didn’t change my job at the time, just my perspective, that “I change the world, anywhere I go, just by being me”.

I did quickly manifest my way out of that job and on to my current path but that’s a story for another time [it’s a hell of a story, I felt like I was in the twilight zone for a few weeks].

For most Empaths, they feel like they are living a lie, by having to pretend they like doing a job, that they don’t. It’s not about pretending, it’s about your perspective and understanding how that current job can serve your purpose, temporarily, until you find your true path. When we find gratitude, we find opportunity.

After I was ejected out of my previous job, I thought I would find myself diving head first into my own business, but that wasn’t the Universes plan. I found myself at high end western boutique and I quickly discovered why! Within months I became an expert on fashion, artistry, craftsmanship, sales and high end client relationships. I cut 10 years of falling on my face, out the equation. I learned so much, that I wrote a book and a guide on the Psychology of Sales, added a consulting division to my brand and discovered my next passion project [it’s going to take the “spiritual coaching” industry by storm!!!]
I continued to prove to myself, my ability to crush any and every sales goal put in front of me.

This opportunity may have seemed like a detour but it has allowed me to become a SALES EXPERT, I have unlocked and discovered the psychology behind sales, which lead me to writing my first guide, SELLING LIKE A GANGSTER™️. It’s full of strategy, perspective, mindset, psychology of sales and language, as well as insight on how to cultivate and maintain high end client relationships.

The point is, I could have been pissed off that I wasn’t doing MY business full time, but I saw it as a blessing and an opportunity and it delivered! I saw it as an opportunity to get paid to go to fashion and merchandising school, I get paid to meet and connect with some of the most successful entrepreneurs from around the globe. My phone is now full of millionaires and billionaires that I could call and chat with at anytime.

It got to a point where I was being offered a “job” on a daily basis, which gave birth to an entirely new opportunity, TRAINING ELITE SALES TEAMS.

This one particular gentleman was so addimite, “Can I please hire you, I need you to come work for me.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I’m actually working on my own thing but you can hire me to come train your staff! I help you duplicate me!”

Gentleman: “Um Yes! I never thought about that. Lets do that!”

You have to follow your instincts even when they are leading in a direction you don’t clearly understand. The Universe is always working in your favor. Trust her.

I know for myself I can not sell a product I do not believe in… it is literally torture!
So make sure your aligning yourself with products and service that you can stand behind, or create them yourself.

Working with others can be extremely challenging, just remember that you can’t change anyone else or their attitude but you can change yours. [This actually forces those around you to raise their vibration or get lost.] Stand in your power, speak your truth and shine your light. Be persistent in your growth and desire for success and never stop striving for inner peace.

I feel extremely blessed to have the perspective of opportunity, to build my dream life while getting paid to learn and connect. My true peace has come from creating something that allows me to be authentically me, all the time, while helping others reach their dreams, while simultaneously raising the vibration of the planet!

Photo Credit: “Light Work” by @autumnskyartimage.jpg